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205. A Skill



"Half?" Ike was in the middle of tossing it away, but he held it back at the last second. He raised a brow, interested.

The Magpie King nodded. "That skill was considered so powerful that the clans over here split it into two. They hid both halves of the skill. I found one, and I think I know where the other one is."

"So why didn\'t you go get it?" Ike asked warily.

The Magpie King scowled. "Because it was somewhere I couldn\'t reach. I\'m one of the strongest monsters in the region, but even I can\'t thoughtlessly enter that place. But now that there\'s three of us this strong, all together, I\'m sure we can take it on." His scowl lightened into a beaming smile.

"Mhm. Are you sure you aren\'t planning to toss us in as cannon fodder, then swoop in and claim the loot?" Ike asked.

Shock flashed across the Magpie King\'s face. He staggered back, then quickly caught himself and put on a neutral face. "W-what? I wouldn\'t do that. Me? No, no. We\'re friends now!"

Ike chuckled under his breath. He flashed a look at Wisp, who shared his smile. Turning back to the Magpie King, he shook his head. He\'s as easy to read as a little kid. I don\'t really have to worry about him betraying us, if he\'s going to be that transparent about it every time. "Hey, kid."

"I\'m over four hundred!" the Magpie King protested. "No, five hundred!"

"Yes, yes. I\'m sure you\'re very old and venerable. Very impressive indeed. So listen, kid. I can\'t keep calling you the Magpie King. Do you have a name?" Ike asked.

He opened his mouth, then shut it. His head tilted. "Isn\'t Magpie King enough?"

"That\'s a title, not a name," Ike pointed out.

The Magpie King tilted his head back the other way, totally unable to comprehend. "Huh?"

"Let\'s just call him Mag," Wisp interrupted.

Ike nodded, agreeing. "Mag works for me."

The boy looked from one to the other, then nodded. "Okay."

Shawn popped over Ike\'s shoulder. "How many young boys are you going to name?"

Mag startled. He jumped back. "Where were you?"

"Shut up, grandpa," Ike shot back. He stood, tucking the skill into his ring. "Let\'s go find the other half of this skill, then. Might as well, right?"

"Yes!" Mag agreed eagerly.

"And no betraying us," he added, waggling a finger at Mag.

Mag gasped, pressing his hands to his chest. "I would never!"

"Uh huh. Can\'t trust birds. They\'re tricksy beasts," Wisp said, narrowing her eyes.

"Spiders are the creepy ones," Mag shot back.

Wisp rolled her eyes.

A second later, Mag turned to Ike. He tilted his head. "What kind of beast are you?"

"Huh?" Ike frowned, then sighed. He shook his head and turned away. "Which way are we going?"

"Yeah, Ike. What kind of beast are you?" Wisp asked, smirking. She punched his shoulder and jogged out in front of him, skipping backward to give him a smug grin.

"Shut up."

Mag tilted his head the other way. "Is it sensitive? Are you a weak beast?"

"The weakest. Suuu-per weak. Like, worm level. No—worse than a worm," Wisp said, giggling.

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"Says the spider," Ike pointed out. It was hard to be insulted when a bug compared him to a bug. It was a pot calling the kettle black kind of situation.

"What? Worms are way weaker than spiders. Spiders are strong. Top of the food chain," Wisp declared.

"Not at all. Spiders are weaklings. Fodder for birds," Mag replied, taken aback.

Wisp bristled. "Fucking birds. Can\'t trust them. They don\'t understand the terror of a spider. You know, all kinds of beasts live in fear of spiders. No one wants to face a spider!"

"You just snatch them up in your beak and eat them. Spiders aren\'t scary at all," Mag said.

"You take that back! We\'re the horror of the forest, of the city, of everything. The terror that crawls in the night. Beasts quake. Bugs flee. Everyone lives in awe and fear of our webs, our venom, our prowess. Even humans are afraid of us. Even human mages fear us. Who fears birds? No one, that\'s who. You little feathery bastards sing and preen and spend so long looking pretty that no one\'s even scared of you anymore. It\'s totally embarrassing how pretty you think you are," Wisp said, tossing her hair.

"But we are pretty," Mag said evenly, completely unmoved. He gestured at himself. "Look at me. I\'m beautiful. My shiny black feathers. My shimmery white scales. Look at these beautiful robes. I picked them out myself! And this tassel that compliments my black eyes and black hair. What are you wearing? Some human robe that doesn\'t even fit you right? You can tell you didn\'t pick it out at all. It\'s not even fashionable. Whoever gave you that robe is no friend, I\'ll tell you that. It\'s at least half a century behind the day\'s fashion. Honestly, I\'m embarrassed for you. The next time we go to town, I\'ll help you buy something pretty, so you can look pretty like me."

"Who wants to look pretty?" Wisp riposted, showing her teeth.

"Me. You. Everyone. There isn\'t a single person in this world that does not want to be pretty," Mag declared grandiosely. He gestured at Ike. "Even someone as ugly as him wants to be pretty in his soul."

At that, Wisp suddenly bit back a snort. She looked at Ike, her big eyes shining with mirth.

"What? I\'m not ugly," Ike said, taken aback. He looked down at himself. He was maturing into a man, with broad shoulders and large hands, but not in an ugly way. In fact, since he\'d last Ranked up, he\'d grown even more handsome than before. His skin was clearer than any girl\'s back in the slums, and his face, which had never been far below average, had improved to well above average. He wouldn\'t call himself pretty, maybe, but he was definitely attractive.

"You aren\'t ugly, but you aren\'t pretty either," Mag allowed. He spread his wings, dancing in front of them so they could get a good look at his feathers. "See? Pretty is king. You\'ll never attract a lady if you aren\'t pretty."

Ah. Well, he is a bird. Ike\'s thoughts flashed to the birds he\'d seen in his travels. The women were demure, dark and muted, while the male birds were bright, flashy colors, with vibrant plumage that begged to be plucked. Mag\'s aesthetics might be a little warped from a human perspective, but from a bird\'s perspective, he was right on the money.

Ike sighed. "At least you don\'t think eating your mate is an essential part of the business."

"What? Eating—who would help me sit on the eggs?" he asked, shocked.

"Sit on the eggs? You just put them in a sack and throw them up somewhere high. Sit?" Wisp blinked at him, lost.

Ike chuckled, amused.

Wisp whipped around to him. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. What do you do with your eggs, then?"

Mag turned toward him as well. He glanced at Wisp. "He\'s human?"

"Yeah. He\'s not a beast at all."

"Oh. Too bad for him."

Even Shawn perked up. "I never did manage to glimpse any human eggs."

Ike cleared his throat. "That\'s because there aren\'t any. Humans don\'t lay eggs."

"What? Where do humans come from, then?" Wisp demanded.

Mag nodded, his brows furrowed. "You\'re being ridiculous. Don\'t think you can pull one over us because we\'re beasts and you\'re human? Everyone comes from an egg. No matter how powerful you are, you were once a tiny little egg!"

"Well… that\'s not true for humans. We\'re born like… like dogs, or cats. Live. No egg," Ike explained.

"Live?" Wisp asked, completely and utterly shocked. She frowned, furrowing her brow. "How does your mother keep you from eating her while she\'s vulnerable?"

"What\'s the point of a father if he isn\'t there to sit on the egg?" Mag asked, his voice slightly shaky, as if his whole world had just been upended. "Don\'t tell me the father doesn\'t have a job in humans. That\'s too sad. I won\'t believe it. We men exist to help hatch a healthy egg! If you aren\'t there to help hatch the egg, what\'s the point of having men at all?"

"I know, right?" Wisp said, nodding. "That\'s why you eat the man."

"That\'s right. What stops the woman from eating the man, if you aren\'t going to egg-sit? What\'s even the point of a man who doesn\'t egg-sit?" Mag demanded.

Ike put his hands up, silently asking for a pause. "Human relationships are very, very different from spiders and birds."

Mag shook his head at Wisp. "Humans are messed up."

"You\'re preaching to the choir," Wisp agreed, nodding.

"From my perspective, you two are the weird ones," Ike said, returning a shrug.

Mag kept shaking his head. Wisp chuckled and shook her head as well. Ike sighed. "I\'m outnumbered. This isn\'t fair. I need some live-birthing beasts on my side."

Mag startled. "There\'s beasts that give live birth?"

Ike waved his hand. "Let\'s just… move on from this topic, okay? Mag, where\'s that place of yours? The one with the other half of the skill?"

Mag stared at the ground for a few moments, his brows furrowed, then startled and looked up. "Oh! This way, this way."

He took the lead, hurrying off over the bone-covered earth. Bones clattered under his feet, but he moved sure-footed, used to the bones. Ike and Wisp followed him. Wisp hopped from bone to bone, darting and flipping across the field, while Ike walked slowly for him, picking each step. Overhead, the birds fell apart, cawing and splitting. There was a mournful air to it, as if they were mourning the death of their god.

The sky cleared. Aside from a lonely red throne in a bleached sea of bones, nothing remained of the once-(self-proclaimed) king.


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