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Chapter 12 - IT WASN\'T THE DEVIL\'S FAULT THOUGH...

As for her brothers, she informed them that she found a different work but, she didn\'t specify what work it was. On weekend, they visited their mother again. Arthur was also there, claiming that he was inly dropping by from checking his sister-in-law.

"How was your work lately?" Arthur asked her while peeling an apple for Cayenne\'s mother.

"It\'s good. I didn\'t have any trouble at work and everyone was very nice to me."

"That\'s good to know. If you need my help in the future, don\'t hesitate to tell me. I\'m willing to lend a helping hand."

"Thanks." For some reason, Cayenne didn\'t want to ask for his help. There\'s this little voice in her that always tells her not to ask help from him because she won\'t be able to repay him. Is wrong of her to doubt him?

Luiz and Kyle were chatting with their mother about school activities and it seemed that their mother became a little bit livelier than the last time they visited her. And the doctor said that she stopped refusing her medication as well. To Cayenne, it was a good sign.

Cayenne didn\'t speak much to her mother and Arthur was always there the whole time. "Don\'t you have anything else to do?" she asked him hesitantly.

"Do you want me to leave already?" Arthur retorted back to her.

"No. I just don\'t want to inconvenience you."

"It\'s fine. I don\'t mind staying with you guys here."

Kyle and Luiz wanted to tease their sister and Arthur but before they could utter a single word, Cayenne threw sharp glares at them. Kyle swallowed her words back and just smiled faintly.

"Yen?"

"Yes, ma?"

"I was just thinking that you\'ve been taking care of us and didn\'t think too much for yourself. I am just wondering if you are interested in getting married."

"I am not." Cayenne answered instantly. "I don\'t want to get married or have any relationship."

"Why?"

"It is tiring. It is a hassle, a waste of my time, a distraction, a bother and a whole lot more. I just don\'t want to." Listening to her answer, Arthur smiled. Even with a smile on his lips, Cayenne couldn\'t see the happiness in his eyes. "Anyway, let\'s not talk again about this."

Her mother just nodded her head while stealing a glance at the young man who liked her daughter for so many years. She really couldn\'t stop blaming herself. \'If I am not sick, my daughter wouldn\'t suffer this much for us. Everything is really my fault.\' She sadly told herself this truth.

Cayenne and her brothers stayed in the hospital for two days and left on Sunday night since she had to work on Monday, and her brothers needed to go to school as well.

"Sis, don\'t you like Arthur?" Kyle asked him while they were walking on their way to the small apartment.

"Let\'s not talk about him." Cayenne shut him up and Kyle, being the obedient little brother, decided to stop asking such question.

She didn\'t particularly hate him but something\'s really off with her feeling whenever he\'s around. She just couldn\'t put her fingers on that specific reason. She pushed him off to the back of her mind and thought about her new job. She will be starting tomorrow and it made her feel so nervous.

The word sleeping was just a normal activity to her. However, since she started working in Clover Hotel, she heard so many things about \'sleeping\' and she found that, to other people it was an act of giving your body to someone. That was why she asked him a week ago, if sleeping was just really sleeping and no other hidden meanings. She will trust her boss for now since she had slept with him last time and he didn\'t do anything to her.

"Am I doing the right thing?" Cayenne asked herself in worry. "This is really ridiculous. I should just back out. But, I signed the contract." Cayenne was talking to herself, agreeing and disagreeing on her own ideas. "Come to think of it, I didn\'t see any specific duration of time in this work. Does this mean I\'ll sleep with him forever?"

Her heart thumped in her chest and she thought it would come out of her body. She was tricked! She tricked him! She took a pillow and punched it several times to let out her frustration. "It wasn\'t the devil\'s fault though. I was the one who signed it without asking him for the length of time. I am so stupid." She slapped her own forehead several times before slumping her body down on her bed again.

She was tired but she couldn\'t sleep knowing that she\'d be getting into the devil\'s lair starting tomorrow. "Lord, just give me strength to endure all this and please enlighten my boss to never do anything to me. I know you won\'t fail me." Cayenne prayed and closed her eyes to sleep.

One hour passed, she was still awake.

Two hours passed, still wide awake.

Five hours passed, her brain was fuzzy but she was still wide awake.

In the end, Cayenne was able to get some sleep when the dawn was breaking. She set an alarm to wake her up an hour and half before her shift which didn\'t worry her. Still, when she woke up to start preparing, she was feeling dizzy from anxiety and lack of sleep. "Please help me survive this day." She murmured to herself while walking groggily to the bathroom.